It appears to me that my life (and more than likely the rest of the universe) is subject to the ebbs and flows of highs and lows. The frequency and intensity may vary and there's a sine wave (look it up if you need to) for pretty much everything you can think of. Just imagine how complicated and convoluted your life's sine wave looks when charting everything? Food, Music, Happiness, Tolerance, hair cuts, sex, driving, friends, work, generosity, pain, consuming, spending, earning or even angry birds. The list is endless. The matrix of lines even then affects each other. Pain is high so food is up there too but then weight suffers and so on and so forth. Sometimes they are good and perform a useful circuit breaker and other times not so.
As a young stupid adult I was a smoker. My parents weren't so I freely admit my teenage insecurity and wish to be cool lead me down that path. As a young adult Metallurgist shift worker I would not enter the control room where I was about to begin a 12 hour shift without at least a full packet of Dunhill blue. Smokers will tell you there are days when the cigarette is the life saver and other days you wonder why you even bother. I chose an ebb like this to stop, threw away the near full pack and just never bought another. Sure I'd bludge a fag from a mate after a few too many red wines but I was never ever addicted again. That ebb was of particular benefit to me. I only wish the pain from bloodied nail beds stopped me from biting my nails too! now that's what I call an addiction! God please provide an ebb to stop that one for good. Not all of them, just the 4 sacrificial ones.
Music has its own frequency and comes and goes. My taste moves from one to another in phases and is quite all encompassing for the duration. For some reason Hunter Hayes is in my head now. I suspect the boss and a few other strong male voices will star in my earphones until another wave hits. At what point I decided I liked country music I have no idea but it must have been at a low I suspect.
Food and cooking is a great love of mine, I get excited and driven at the prospect of cheffing a marvellous and kudos inducing meal. I love the praise as much as the next person but its not my main driver. It's satisfying that wave of need to create that and see an outcome that's so good. I'd still be doing it if it was only cooking for myself. I only wish my drive was constant and not subject to these highs and lows.
I'm sure my highs are getting loftier and my lows going subterranean as I get older. Is that a function of anything other than years I have no idea. I'm not even sure others have the same sensations as me in this regard. I have a mathematical brain more or less so am quite comfortable with the assumption that the trend will correct itself over time and average out to be normal. In the mean time though (pun intended) I have to tell myself that this ebb is not the last one and that getting past this is not only rewarded with a great high but another ebb as well.
I had a high today actually, my employer was named the highest corporate donor for Movember 2012 and lo and behold, I was the highest fund raiser within that corporation. It's ironic that such a feat is the subject of celebration in a post about the potential for highs and lows.
I am looking forward to the cooking high where I can do a bomb alaska but not the music low where Boy George enters my play list.
No comments:
Post a Comment